Michelle Kirk

Going to New York and getting certified to teach the Fight Like a Girl program was one of the most empowering things I have ever done for myself.  Mr. Steve Kardian was totally awesome!  He was very patient with me as I stressed over flying by myself to New York and all the little things one has to take care of on a trip.  When I mentioned to him that I was thinking about renting a car, he said I could just get a cab.  I blurted out, “that will be a new experience!”  He just laughed.  With everything else he had to do, he found time to call me when he knew I would be getting on the plane and wished me a good flight and asked me to send a text when I got to the hotel that he had arranged for me to stay at.  He even set me up with a really cool roommate, a fellow instructor, who became a new friend by the end of the night.   I watched the sun set over the mountains in Knoxville as I waited for my plane and woke up to mountains in New York.  I thought to myself, this place ain’t too bad after all. 

After all that stressing out, I finally got to the first class and one of the first things Steve said was that this was just the beginning of our training (how right he was).  It was obvious from the beginning that Steve Kardian really is an expert.  He chided me when I got home for not taking better notes, but in my defense, almost every word out of his mouth was worth writing down. My classmates were awesome and really encouraged me.  Some of them have been teaching the FLAG curriculum for several years and had some really good advice and insight.  Steve was right when he said it was a good group of people and I did walk away feeling empowered, just like he promised.  The thing that most people don’t understand about rape is that it’s not about sex.  It’s about power.  It’s about one person forcing another to do something they do not want to do.  As I learned the FLAG techniques, I felt myself slowly beginning to take my power back.  I cannot begin to tell you how empowering it is to know that if you find yourself in a vulnerable position, you know what to do and you don’t have to just lay there and be compliant.  At the end, Steve put on the FIST suit and we had the opportunity (just like students in our course here in Knoxville, Tn will have) to feel what it is like to go full force against an “attacker.”   It was very emotional and empowering as classmates screamed, “Kick him harder!  You can do it!  That’s it!  You go girl!”  One classmate in particular made an impression on me.  As I left, she said, “You CAN fight!”    She’s right.  Never again will I consider myself a victim.   I am a SURVIVOR and now I know how to FIGHT LIKE A GIRL!

As the years go by I look forward to adding stories of my students and how FLAG has changed their lives for the better, given them more confidence, and helped them to make better decisions about their safety.  For now, all I know is that I have come so far since the spring of 2009 when I first talked to Mr. Steve Kardian.  I am continuing to learn from Steve, and Devan, and many others every day.  My commitment to my students and myself is to never quit learning what it takes to stay safe!